04 November 2010

Where to Begin

Generally, starting at the beginning is a good idea.  The problem is the beginning of life-as-I now-know-it seems a distant memory.  Actually it was just the day before Labor Day when Mark left for a job in DC and I was left to run our household alone.  He was gone from then until just about two weeks ago.  He came home for a visit and left this afternoon.  I wanted to talk more with no kids around to interrupt us.  I wanted to bury my nose in his neck a little longer.  I wanted to hold back the tears so he wouldn't feel guilty leaving me here alone.  I couldn't.  Then I turned around to my daughter's precious face looking at me, trying to figure out my sorrow.  I could almost see it penetrating her.  Besides, there was carpool, homework and dinner.  There was no time to curl into a ball and cry.  That is good- MOST of the time.  It could be beneficial, occasionally.

That being said, I want to jump in where I am right now.  No time for back story.  Feeling the need to share the details of how we arrived at this situation has had me paralyzed in writing the blog.  I miss it.  I feel inspired.  So here goes.

Tonight I just wanted some time away from the house and the kids.  Thankfully my new neighbor who happens to be an old friend (yes, long story there) took me to the bookstore.  Bookstores are one of my favorite places.  My friend spotted a book called The Hate Book.  It was covered with pictures of rainbows, unicorns and sunshine.  We laughed at the bizarre combination of title and cover art.  I couldn't imagine liking anything about this book being the Polly Anna, glass half-full, rose-colored glasses girl that I am but I couldn't resist just a peek.  Well, the next hour and a half was spent thoroughly enjoying the book, chatting with my friend and making my own hate list.  I didn't know just how hateful I was and it inspired me to share my random list with you.  I hope you will make your own list and maybe share it with me.  Okay, maybe just one thing you a comment to this post... pretty please?

I hate that I haven't blogged since August 14.
I hate that I have great ideas for blogs but don't stop to write them or at least jot notes down for later.
I hate knowing I would probably never go back to those notes.
I hate that my fingers are not as fast as the thoughts flying through my head.
I hate that the best jobs for Mark are in DC but we really want to make a life in New Orleans.
I hate that lots of people don't "get" New Orleans and love it like I do.
I hate that we couldn't live in England longer.
I hate that I can't speak another language.
I hate that I didn't always read the assigned books in high school.
I hate that there aren't enough hours in the day.
I hate that I can't be in New Orleans, Nantucket, New York, Paris and Disneyworld simultaneously.
I hate the way most people drive.  I hate that I think I am a better driver than most people.

I hate that since Mark left, I haven't read, written or knitted anything.
I hate that I can't remember half the things I wanted to share with you.
I hate wondering if anyone cares to read my "postcards" now that they are from New Orleans instead of the UK.
I hate cucumbers.
I hate that I will never get to sing and dance on Broadway.
I hate that I didn't realize until now how therapeutic this is

Shall you take a turn then? (read in a British accent) :-)

PS.  I hate hitting "publish" then having to wait on comments.  I hate that I often need instant gratification.


  1. I hate to see a friend sad!

  2. Dina, I'm so happy to see you are posting again, I'm so happy you guys are settling in N.O. ( Rodrigo wants to go back and graduate with his Holy Name friends -read Sam-) and can not wait for you to post again. I love to hear how you enjoy life surrounded by your beautiful family and even though Mark might not be in N.O. his presence is always
    there with you in every one of your kids, that makes the time with him many times more important. I agree with you: I hate that there are not enough hours in a day, but hey I can help you learn Spanish anytime!! And PLEASE keep on writing!!!!!
    Warm regards,
    Vicky Dajud-Azuero

  3. Hey Dina,
    Great Blog, as usual! You definitely have a gift and I'm glad to see you using it again.
    Here's one from my hate list:
    I hate that time flies by so quickly and that I don't spend more of it calling, writing or visiting family and friends!
    Love you, Connie

  4. I hate that I have not seen you in years.

    I hate that I have never been to New Orleans.

    I hate my job.

    I do love cucumbers though . . .

  5. I Love it that you are writing again! I hate it when I check to see if you have written and...nothing...I completely understand how this can get away from you but I love finding that you have posted something. Keep on writing! I hate it when a friend is lonely. My husband will be in NOLA for the better part of this week. If you see him give him a hug for me. Hi to your five!
    Lora Leyens

  6. Sorry to hear Mark has left again. Glad that Mary is near by now. Maybe next time I come visit we can get together. Keep writing!


  7. Dina:
    I am so inspired by you. I have always enjoyed reading your blog. You are a fabulous writer.
    So here goes, here's the beginning of my hate list:
    I hate that Jane Austen lived only long enough to write 5 novels.
    I hate that money is not always easy to come by.
    I hate when I have a disagreement with a friend.
    I hate when I worry.
    I love my family and friends.

    I have lot's more, but I won't bore you. You are right, it is very therapeutic..